The Resolve to Forgive

Morgan Freeman as Nelson Mandela in Invictus

"Forgiveness starts here. Forgiveness starts now."

In the 2009 movie Invictus South African President Nelson Mandela speaks these words to the head of his personal protection detail who had expressed misgivings regarding the additional men assigned to the detail. These additional men had been assigned to the previous presidential protection detail and had in fact tried to kill Mandela and his men. In order to emphasize the need for change if South Africa were to be united after Apartheid, Mandela affirms, "Forgiveness starts here. Forgiveness starts now."

What does it mean to forgive? Literally it means to release or let go of someone or something.

For example, we talk about forgiving a debt. That means we no longer hold a person accountable for the money owed to us. We release that person from his or her financial obligation.

Likewise, when we forgive people for their words or actions, we are releasing them from their guilt. We are promising no longer to hold them accountable for the hurt they have caused. We are assuring them that we will not dwell on what they have done or allow their words or actions to taint our relationship in the future.

As such, forgiveness is liberating for those who are forgiven. It removes the roadblock of guilt and paves the way for a renewed relationship.

Forgiveness, however, not only liberates the forgiven. It also frees the forgiver. To forgive is to promise myself that I will not allow my hurt and my anger to eat me up from the inside. To forgive is to promise myself that my thoughts will not be clouded by resentment and my desire to "get even." To forgive is to let go of the offense so it cannot dominate my life.

Forgiveness sounds like a "win-win" for all involved. It's a gift for the receiver as well as the giver. If that's the case why does forgiveness seem so rare?

It's because forgiveness comes with a price tag. If you owe me $20 and I forgive your debt, it costs me $20 to do so. If you cut me off in traffic and I let it go, it costs me the seeming satisfaction of road rage. If you cut me with your words and I don't retaliate, it costs me the opportunity to put you in your place.

Forgiveness always comes with a price tag, even for God. God wanted to forgive us, His children, for our selfish words and actions that hurt Him as well as others. He didn't want to treat us the way we deserved. He wanted to forgive us. But there was a price tag. Someone had to pay the cost of our forgiveness, and that one was Jesus, God's eternal Son.

Jesus' suffering and death on the cross was the price for your forgiveness, a very steep price. But the heavenly Father and Son determined that you were worth the cost. They had the resolve to pay the price so you could be set free from your guilt and God could be set free from His anger.

As we enter a new year with all sorts of resolutions, maybe we need to add to the list the resolve to forgive. It might be the best gift we ever gave ourselves.